DISH OF THE DAY

Keen to attract custom from all quarters of the carnivorous electorate, Crombie's of Broughton Street have been marketing their delicious-sounding 'Scottish Election Sausage'.

Gone now, alas, but Spurtle relishes the prospect of a Coalition Haggis: broken pledges, minced aspirations, unpalatable cuts and normally unthinkable compromises, all wrapped in the stomach of national interest.

Bon appetit!