DRIVEN UP THE WALLS

About a month ago I was in my flat, minding my own business, when suddenly I was distracted by a familiar sound on the street outside. 

It was a familiar jingle, a slightly annoying rendition of Yankee Doodle. The kind of sound that makes you grab some loose change and run outside as fast as you can. However, there was something that didn’t feel quite right. Then it hit me: An ice cream van in January ... whatever’s wrong with the world? 

I peered out of the window trying to check that I wasn’t going crazy but there was nothing to be seen. The street was empty. Perhaps I’d imagined it. It was freezing outside and who would have wanted an ice cream at that time of year? Who would want to leave their cosy home to stand in the cold? 

Minutes later I hear the same sound again. I called Mrs Left-Handed Tea Drinker: ‘I think there’s an ice cream van outside’.

‘An ice cream van?’ she replied. ’In January? Are you sure you didn’t imagine it?’

Did I imagine it? I looked outside but the street was still empty.

‘Didn’t you hear it?’ I called.  

‘No,’ she shouted.

A few days later I had forgotten all about the incident until I heard that same tune again. I rushed to the window to try and catch a glimpse of the mysterious van stalking the streets of Bellevue. There was nothing there. I looked out of another window but the streets were empty. There was no sign of it.

As the weeks went by the Yankee Doodle came and went and I learnt to ignore it. My interest had waned, and if the tune was really in my head then at least it wasn’t keeping me up at night.

Last week, though, once again, the annoying jingle filled the streets. This time my curiosity got the better of me. I peered out of the window – One last look, I promised myself.  

At last I caught a glimpse of it. There it was in all its shiny glory, a real-life ice cream van. I wasn’t nuts after all. 

Mrs LHTD was out so I had to prove to her that it existed. I grabbed my camera and ran into the cold and wintry night. I was ready to capture the beast that had been haunting me for weeks and I might even treat myself to an ice cream while I was there. But when I got outside, the streets were deserted and it had disappeared. There was no trace, and it hasn't been seen or heard since. 

Has anyone else caught a glimpse of the lesser-spotted ice cream van? Do you know anyone who’s been tempted out into the dark to purchase a 99? Am I going round the Twister? 

Send your field observations, please, by email spurtle@hotmail.co.uk or Twitter  @theSpurtle or direct to The Left-Handed Tea Drinker 

[Photos above: Wikipedia, Creative Commons.]

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 Fergus Smith I actually saw it stopped at Redbraes last winter. In the snow.

 David Rawson It often stops on Melgund Terrace, but never long enough for me to find my wallet.