Pointless (ˈpɔɪntləs) adj. Having little or no sense, use, or purpose.
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For all Broughton’s beauty and splendour, there are some things which are truly and utterly pointless. Below I highlight a few of our beloved barony's disjointed peculiarities and I hope that with your help we will be able to catalogue them all.
Bellevue Place traffic island
When referring to traffic islands, what size constitutes island status? This traffic island on Bellevue Place is so big that it should be given a new title. I admit that it’s not completely pointless as it serves a purpose, but given its size could there not be a flowerbed fitted, or some grass or even a bench?
No parking on pavement
The small sign on the front of the Waverley Exchange building on East London Street is very much stating the obvious. Are they referring to the actual pavement or the broken tiles outside the building?
And have you ever seen a BT van which wasn’t parked on the pavement? They seem to be the exception to the rule. Perhaps BT can share the ‘NO PARKING ON PAVEMENT’ policy with their drivers.
Always read the small print
This pointless observation doesn’t just apply to Broughton but I feel it needs to be mentioned. There is no point whatsoever in having small print on an advertising hoarding, unless of course you don’t want anyone to read it. The digital advertising displays are just as bad and you have to see the loop through several times to read the full drivel.
While we’re on Leith Walk, why did the Forest Group install this mini garden next to its digital advertising board? There is no point to this little bit of greenery when it is next to a giant illuminated eyesore. They could have at least put a bench there for those who like watching adverts or for those who suddenly become blinded by the bright lights.
Road indent
A single yellow line indicates that parking or waiting at the roadside is prohibited at certain times of the day.
Is there a vehicle that is able to park in this road indent on Broughton Place Lane? Could they not have skipped this indent and made a straight line across it instead?
Fenced-off
I have no idea what this fenced-off section outside Tesco on Broughton Road is for. Is it used to hold back the hordes of shoppers waiting for Tesco’s to open in the mornings? Perhaps we’ll see a new mini Tesco’s Express kiosk installed there soon, for those too lazy to cross the road and go to the larger store.
You may think that even mentioning Broughton’s most pointless is pointless in itself. You may even consider that I too am one of Broughton’s most pointless. This is not a definitive list, it is a work in progress so please share your own observations and once the list is complete we can then ignore them and get on with our lives.
You can share your pointless observations, or any other musings, grumblings, thoughts and complaints with me at @TheLHTD or via e-mail.
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Martin Donnelly @martindonnelly
@theSpurtle @TheLHTD You'd get a motorbike in there, easy.
@theSpurtle @TheLHTD Only a matter of time pic.twitter.com/UiTFUMIbwR
New Town Flâneur @NewTownFlaneur
@TheLHTD Yes, the Bellevue Place island is big enough to be considered a traffic continent. I usually take the train across it. @theSpurtle
@NewTownFlaneur @TheLHTD @theSpurtle I have literally picnicked on it.