ISSUE 351 – PUBLISHED TOMORROW!
As you read this, copies of the June Spurtle are already thundering towards Broughton like cats urged on by professional couriers with no sense of urgency.
Issue 351 leaps from the shelf with news on Page 1 of Council plans to snog, settle or chuck, towering ambition toppled, top turfs, and infusion enthusings.
On Page 2, local repercussions and odd justifications feature, as do doos, questionable neighbourliness, invasive plastic, and an old uncle possibly leaving Edinburgh for good.
YORK PLACE – SERIOUS SEXUAL ASSAULT
Police appeal for information
Police Scotland released a press release this evening which we reproduce below in full.
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Detectives are appealing for information after a teenage girl was the victim of a serious sexual assault in Edinburgh on Sunday, 25 May, 2025.
The incident happened shortly after 5am in a basement storage area on York Place.
ASSAULT ON BROUGHTON ROAD – POLICE APPEAL FOR INFORMATION
Police Scotland issued a press release this evening which we publish below unedited and in full.
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Around 1.20pm on Tuesday, 20 May, 2025, a 76-year-old man was walking on Broughton Road near to Tesco when he was approached by a man and assaulted.
The man did not require hospital treatment.
The suspect is described as being between 60 and 75 years of age, around 5ft 10in in height, of slim build and bald. He was wearing light coloured clothing and has a distinctive crouched walk.
SCRATCHED GRAFFITI ONLY SUPERFICIAL
Dear Spurtle
I forwarded your report on a Bellevue bench's Italian connection (NEW IN BELLEVUE – AN ITALIAN HERO, 2 April 2025) to my contacts south of the Alps and they found the inscribed text "rather shallow" and unlikely to add to Edinburgh's eleganza.
However, referencing the great Immanuel Kant, they described the Council's thoughts behind their intervention as at least 'comforting.
Harald Tobermann
(Pilrig)
QUINTINSHILL REMEMBERED
The Royal Scots Regimental Museum’s annual outreach exhibition opened at Out of the Blue this morning. Depute Lord Provost Cllr Lezley Cameron (right) helped launch the event.
This year’s exhibition focuses on the Quintinshill rail disaster of 22 May 1915, in which 227 people died including 216 officers and soldiers of the 1st/7th (Leith Battalion) on their way to the Gallipoli campaign.
ISSUE 350 – OUT TOMORROW!
As you read this, advance copies of the May Spurtle are already spreading across the barony like tree pollen chasing atopics out in the fresh air for the first time since February.
Issue 350 begins with transport and environment and Copenhagen and climate change and the most enormous bed-bug you have ever had the misfortune to meet.
Relax on Page 2 to the furtive rustle of bin-tourists, the tinkle of trams and sunken manhole covers, splutters of bunker rage, and gasps at the lack of space in 3 local pubs.